My Thoughts On Becoming a Mum

I've always been the kind of person kids are just drawn to. I go to friends places for dinners and get stared at until I stop and give them a cuddle or play. I've  managed to get babies to laugh before their  dads (no I will never forgive myself for that one!) and could easily get babies off to sleep or to take a bottle when only their parents have managed before. I'm just that type of person. Which comes in handy when I'm an aunt to four!

As for Alex and me, having kids has always been one of those things that we'd 'get to' or discuss eventually. I've always said I'd be happy either way. I've always been so happy with him and our relationship that I didn't want us to push ourselves into parenthood because it's what we should do. I needn't have worried. We've been together for seven years and although we aren't married (yet!) it just felt like the right time. We have our home, we're settled, safe and I'm not working, so why not?! 

For years our ideal would have been the classic, buy a home, get married then have babies. The only reason we didn't wait until we were married first is because there's more of a time limit on having kids (Alex is six years older than me, and although he is only 34, time is a ticking!) and there isn't on getting married. For now, it was almost one or the other so it was a bit of a no brainer decision to start trying.

Once I found out I was pregnant, everything just felt right. Any doubt I had about myself ever being good enough to be a mum instead of just an aunt was gone. I knew this baby was exactly what I'd always wanted and that we'd do just fine with our own. Pregnancy is always a scary journey. Whether it's your first or tenth. The fear of the unknown is still slightly overwhelming, and I know having your own is super different to being there to baby sit for your friends and family. But I'm excited. I'm excited to have responsibility for a tiny half me, half Alex. I'm excited to start this next chapter of my life and I honestly couldn't think of a better guy to go on this journey with.

I know we're a few months away, but to paraphrase Ryan Reynolds:  Alex has made me a mum when I thought I was only ever cool aunt material. I'll be forever grateful for that, he is already an incredible dad. I'm almost 20 weeks. We can't wait for our next appointment to find out the gender. I've never been more excited than I am to be this little ones mum.